I've never known

I've never known what i've wanted to do with my life.
All I know is that since my young teens i've been a hopeless romantic and i've been a writer. I've not necessarily been a good writer, i've not necessarily been good at grammar or punctuation. However, I've put my thoughts to paper and I've blurted out my emotions, it's as if it's all i've ever known.

I used to write poems, write raps, write short stories, write pages and pages of nonsense and it just felt right. I wish that I had taken that and just gone in some sort of direction with it. I've had diaries ever since I can remember, i've had at least 3 online blogs that I can recall and I still come back at 25 years of age and put my thoughts out here.

I just wish that I didn't have to 'wish' to know what I want to do. I'm so continuously lost. People say 'Who cares' if you don't know what you want to do? Um are you serious? Life is so short and precious, what's the point spending it feeling like you are less that what you are? Or feeling like you have something special but don't know how to use it? Or struggle on a daily basis because you need to know what else is out there?

I'm just going to start writing a novel on some shit.